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Waiting

I’m currently waiting for my first fill. This is what I see. Here are my thoughts...



Boobs = woman

Boobs = femininity

Boobs = stupid

Boobs = powerful


Boobs are dumb. They don’t control anything except maybe your ability to breast feed and my body couldn’t even get that right. I’m dressed today and representing for my team (Roll Tide!) and I finally was able to find a sports bra that fits and doesn’t hurt. They recommend you either wear the surgical compression bra or a front close sports bra. 


But boobs. They do nothing. Why do they have so much power? I did my makeup today and got dressed more than I have since my mastectomy and I feel more myself. I’m not even self conscious about being flat. But I’m STILL in my feels about what my body looks like when I’m naked. One side is lopsided under the arm and the other is round.


Expanders feel (did I say this already?) like a plastic milk jug that’s been trampled flat and shoved under the muscle. When I bend over I can feel my left expander move and I can feel a twinge in my nipple.


All in all, I’m doing well. It’s amazing though how much power women give boobs. Maybe it’s biological. Children are nursed from them. They give life, comfort, sexuality, sensuality... 


I don’t know. Anyways. Here I am in all my flatness. I don’t mind the flat look at all. I know I would miss them. Honestly I’d just miss playing with them myself haha. 


Also, The Husband has been so amazing. Sometimes I get annoyed because he hasn’t done xyz but then I realize, um, he’s busy doing LITERALLY everything else, so he CAN’T do xyz. On top of working and taking care of The Boy. Also, shout out to the inlaws who have been so supportive through this.


#unBRCAble #Godsstillgotthis #inmyfeels #myhusbandisbetterthanyourhusband




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