Ignore Me Like You Mean It

Two weeks post mastectomy with drain totals around 25-30mL and my drains came out! For those of you going through this- take your pain meds before you go. I had planned on taking mine 30 minutes prior to removal. I put it in my pocket and took my water on the car ride so I wouldn’t forget. Unfortunately because of my OTHER medical issue (my memory) I realized after the removal that the reason it hurt so much to remove the drains was because I forgot to take the pill. Whoops!  So yes. If this is something you are going through, take the pain medication. Make sure you give it time to work. My nurse told me to breath in on 3 and then out on 3 and then she pulled the drain. I could literally feel the drain (which was stitched to my side) under my pectoral muscle. As it was pulled out I could feel it unwinding in my CHEST. *shudder*  The anticipation is the worst and yes it’s as bad as you think it will be. My stitches came out today as well and that was nothing. Nothing at all. Pl...

The Boy came home today and I experienced some guilt and dismay at not being able to scoop him up, cuddle him, rock him or rough house with him. He was soooo tired and I know that the next few days he’ll get less fussy. I also KNOW that this is temporary and he’s fine. He is spending lots of quality time with Grandpa, MawMaw (his choice of names) and Daddy. This is a small price to pay for no breast cancer. But you know how moms are. If we can guilt ourselves for any reason, we will. Irrational or not. Even with the knowledge that it’s irrational. Thankfully, our God is the great Healer and His healing promises are being kept with me. I am recovering quickly and well so I’m praising God for that! The hardest part of all of this has been being away from The Boy and the itching- thanks to being allergic to pain meds- and psoriasis itching. Since I don’t need the pain meds, I’m only itching from the psoriasis.  I knew the separation would be very hard for me. But still. Anyways....

In 2016 I had a bilateral mastectomy scheduled in order to prevent breast cancer because my risk puts me at a 98% chance of getting breast cancer.  I found out I was pregnant with The Boy and now he is a whopping 18 months old. And it’s time to make sure I don’t have to fight for my life. So The Man and I have spoken to my doctors and we are moving forward with my preventive bilateral mastectomy. If you follow this page, the next little while will be posts about breast cancer and PBM’s. I’m very well versed in this, so if you continue to follow my page, please share. It’s so important for men and women to have genetic testing done.  Please pray for us as I go through this process and bear with me as I share a lot of TMI and photos etc.

 Today was my first appointment with one of the plastic surgeons that was chosen for me by my breast surgeon based on my other medical issues. This surgeon was Dr. Michael Beckenstein in Birmingham, AL. First, and one of the most annoying things about this trip actually had nothing to do with the doctor, and everything to do with our recent move and insurance.              Unfortunately my Blue Cross insurance decided that it could just do whatever it wanted (as if its a living entity) and they didn't notify us that our policy was changed and we now needed to have a referral not from my breast surgeon but from a primary care doctor. For everything. So even if one specialist refers me to another, I STILL have to go back to a primary doctor in order to get that referral. That was stressful.  Aside from the insurance headaches, when we first got to the office, it was very homey and comfortable. Andrew and I were taken in to watch a video...

Today I got the call from my breast surgeon with her recommendation on who would be best not only for my reconstruction but also for my particular set of medical issues. On April 20th I'll be going in to see Dr. Michael Beckenstein at St. Vincent's Hospital in Birmingham to discuss my options for my reconstruction. At this point I'm just trying not to completely obsess over what's going on soon. But it's hard to do because I really just want to get this over with and deal with it.  I've started to compose some questions to ask my plastic surgeon. Maybe they could help you. - How long will my surgery take? - What are my best options/choices for reconstruction? - Where will my scars be? - Will there be sutures to remove after surgery? - How long will my hospital stay be? - How long until I can work, drive, have sex? - What kind of anesthesia will be used? - What is the percentage of infection? - How many drains will I have? - How long will I have the drains? - How...

Yesterday was my very first, successful breast surgeon appointment. By successful, I mean I didn't run screaming into the parking lot. So there's that. Dr. Winchester at St. Vincent's in Birmingham (Yes, I'm totally plugging her) is amazing. We got there at 4:30 pm. The appointment was at 5. We walked out at around 7:45 after being called back in around 7:00. When we first arrived, even at that late hour, the waiting room was full. Which was surprising, but not THAT surprising. Because I have no cancer and no cells that may be cancer, my appointment consisted mainly of meeting, taking a measure of each other, and then getting my vitals and history. She made sure to give me all my choices to prevent cancer, aside from the mastectomy that I was there to talk about. She examined me and said I was perfect for what's called a "nipple sparing prophylactic mastectomy". We'll call that NSPM for short from now on. So she explained that she does the best NSPM e...

I woke up earlier than normal today and decided to get out of bed and have my cup of coffee alone and in the sun of my kitchen nook.  In all the running of every day between work and school, I wanted to just take a moment. Today is going to be a beautiful spring day. Tomorrow is my first appointment with a breast cancer doctor that specializes in breasts. I've been sitting on positive BRCA 1 and BRCA 2 results for about ten years now, and after seeing a few doctors and plastic surgeons (scary ones!) here and then over the years, it's finally time to decide for good whether or not my prophylactic mastectomy will take place. Andrew (my husband) and I have talked it over so many times that we're both great with the idea of lowering my cancer risk to 5% or lower, especially after it being around 94%. But facing it actually happening is another story. So I'm trying to get back to center and start just being quiet and aware. Turning the phone off. Turning the TV off and j...

"Badge of Courage" I wear this badge of courage on my chest, To tell the world that I'm not like the rest… I may be small and I may be frail, But this little lady is tougher than nails. I wear a badge of courage on my chest To remind me of a weaker woman, It's not small or silver, or a braided gold, Just something that reminds me to let her go. I may be tired and scared, but I'm not weak, I'm the one who beat this thing while standing Within arms open wide, on my own two feet. Scars are brazen and never heal, At least that's the way I think it feels. Sexy is a state of mind, and if I am then so are you. Does your badge lie upon your chest too? Krystal D. Dailey © 2004