Amazingly enough, I've become the housewife. Only, I am not the typical housewife. I don't have kids, and my husband isn't at home to take care of anymore. Which....I can say, I really don't know what to do. I am going out of my mind, and he's only been gone four three days. I miss him, but that's not it totally. The fact that I don't have that face to face contact with him, and the only people I see aside from when I go to church are my in-laws, makes things difficult. I am bored out of my freaking MIND. I play my games, and I clean up after myself, and dust and vaccuum, and play with the dogs. But, I mean, I am going nowhere. School doesn't start for a freaking MONTH, and then it's only two classes. I don't know when I'll see Aaron again, especially with what's going on at the school now. I feel....LOST. Like I don't know where I am going or what I am doing. Maybe it's just a bad day? I don't know. I want to start volunteering at the animal shelter, but that will cost me gas money, and we can't afford that yet. I don't know what to do. I'm trying to FIND things for myself to do, and NONE of them is mentally stimulating. I miss my husband more than I care to admit. I'm sure he hasn't read all of my emails, and if he has, I haven't received anything back from him. Our conversation tonight was less than stimulating, mostly because of my mood probably. I want my life back. I wish I could find a job now, not because of the money, but because it would give me something to DO. Sigh. So if you are reading this, please pray for me. Or CALL ME. Something. Apparently I have friends that can't pick up a phone...at least the one's who live here. And a father. I called my father on Easter, left him a message. STILL nothing from him. Whatever. I know when I call him, he is going to say, "OH, I was JUSt thinking about calling you." He always does. It's kinda pointless to blog when there is no one reading, isn't there? So...I guess...I dunno. Okay....
The Boy has spent all 5 days with his dad. Thursday to Monday evening. Then he came home. He was so tired he didn’t want to talk. So we ended up going to bed and reading Harry Potter (Prisoner of Azkaban). He wanted on the internet but no. I told him no. Eventually he fell asleep. Today we woke up and he immediately asked if he could go to MawMaw and PawPaw’s. I said, “you don’t want to stay home and spend time with me?” He said: no I want to visit them. Cue the first time my feelings have been really hurt by him. He asked for a hug. I’ve always told him I will always hug him. I said, “I don’t want a hug right now because my feelings are hurt. But in a minute I’ll give you a hug.” We went into the living room and he was crying. I asked why. He said, “because you are mad at me and you think I hurt your feelings on purpose.” Well, I quickly set that straight. I told him I knew 100% that he didn’t hurt my feelings on purpose and I knew he never would. That I was abs...
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